Are You Robbing Others of Their Hope With Your Attitude?

Some things you know in your head, and other things you know experiencially. Two weeks ago, I experienced something I've "known" in my head for years, but had not experienced myself.

When the Greeks die, they ask only one question: Did he have passion? I've known that for many years, but two weeks ago I was the recipient of another person's passion. This man loves what he does!

Let me digress... Most of you know I have been having a very hard time for the last two months. Impending blindness, combined with several almost-fatal reactions to prescriptions culminated in major depression for me. I am a writer, and not being able to write -- I could not see -- made my soul shrivel up until I wondered why God was keeping me alive anymore. I did not seem to have a purpose, and I knew I was being a real downer to all of those who loved me. I was being a downer to myself!

There is a scripture that kept coming to my mind: Without hope the people perish. Boy, I knew that to be a fact! I had no hope. One of the drugs (avalide) sucked out all the sodium from my blood, and sunk me into a state of dementia, and scared me so bad I can't describe it. I could not understand what people were saying to me, I couldn't put 10 coherent words together, and I couldn't remember simple things, like where I kept the coffee. I feared I was one of those younger ones who was in Alzheimer's Disease. It was so awful there are no words to describe what I went through for those two months. I accepted no phone calls because I was so ashamed of my condition. And to make matters worse, my primary doctor tends to be negative and easily agitated.

My blessed 32-year friend, Ann, could see what was happening -- she is my only confidante because we have been through so much of life together -- and she took it upon herself to make an appointment for me with a doctor in another city. Normally, there is a waiting list six months long to be seen as a "new patient", but she talked to him personally. Then she picked me up and drove me there. To be honest, I wasn't expecting much from this new doctor.

From the moment this doctor came into the room, I felt my soul sprout wings! There was something about him that made me feel I could fly if I wanted to! By birth, he is Russian, and since I speak a little Russian, we clicked. He was confident, had a sense of humor (very important to me!), and was extremely optimistic. Even when he said, "I can see you are going to be a challenge for me because of your sensitivity to drugs, but I'm up to the challenge!" I felt this powerful sense of relief I have not felt in a long time. He had a twinkle in his eye, a great smile, and he looked me straight in the eye when he talked.

I told him what a relief it was to be around someone so optimistic, and he said, "I love what I do." Here was an excellent doctor, highly respected, and he had passion about what he did! I gotta tell you, I've been to lots of doctors, and there are precious few who love what they do. It seems to me most of them love the status and the money, but not necessarily the patients.

When he saw a copy of my book, he questioned me about it, and when I told him I was the woman who got the abuse/neglect reporting act signed into law during the '70s, he said he would like to read the book. (His wife is a psychologist, so I'm sure she will read it, too.) I couldn't believe it! I gave him the book and told him my heart's desire for the book: to see it in every woman's prison in America. (More than 87% of female prisoners were badly abused before winding up in prison. THOSE are the people for whom the book was written!)

My friend and I left the office and both of us felt like a huge weight had been lifted from both of us. We talked about how rare, but important, it was for people to have passion about what they do. It ignites hope in those to whom they minister.

I feel so grateful for the gift from God (and from my best friend) of hope. It is one of those qualities you don't realize the importance of until you have none and someone gives it to you. I will now modify my own attitude to reflect this gift of God to others. I now know how life changing hope is.

(c) April Lorier | Related Posts

APRIL LORIER - So. California. An award-winning poet, inspirational author and speaker. A survivor of both child abuse and adult domestic abuse, April inspires women to be all that God designed them to be! She first gained recognition as a children's rights crusader while successfully fighting for the passage of the Child Abuse and Neglect Reporting Act (CANRA), which was signed into law by Ronald Reagan.